So I just got a new flat screen TV. Hooked it up, works generally fine. Haven't upgraded to digital cable yet - just basic cable with no premium channels.

But since hooking up the new TV, we've been getting what looks like "pay per view" programming on the high end of the dial (in the 50s and 80s). But not all the time. In fact, sometimes the image will freeze for a few moments and we'll lose the signal completely. These don't appear to be channels like Showtime or HBO, as there's no station identification.

I'd just like to stop here and note that I've now used the phrases "high end of the dial" and "station identification." Perhaps I'm just too old to have a nice TV.

Anyway, on very odd occasions, the image will start fast forwarding - as if someone is scanning through the broadcast. One night, we even got a few minutes of hardcore porn that was being "fast forwarded" as well as a broadcast of Howard Stern's show.

So what's going on here? Are we picking up someone's TiVo? Is that even possible? It's the "fast forwarding" that's so weird, because it means that whatever we're watching isn't intended for broadcast.

Any ideas?

D.

P.S. Also, I suddenly don't get any sound through the TV speakers when I play DVDs. I can get sound from my external speakers, but not the ones on the TV. They were working fine a few days ago. Any help would be appreciated.

I've been told that digital programming is sent out to various stations and networks at high speed, sometimes entire film packages or TV series at once; perhaps you've tapped into that.

As for your sound problem, it sounds like your installer somehow undid your DVD player>TV audio connection. I recommend you have someone come back out to check your set-up, and make sure to request a supervisor, not an installer. Those installer guys often don't have any idea what they're doing or undoing.

Actually, I installed it myself which might be the problem right there. Was working fine for awhile, then I played a DVD on which the menus had sound, but not the main feature. After that, no sound for anything.

Pretty much I wouldn't be able to enjoy my TV at all if Tim weren't around for me to ask questions.

D.

I know exactly what this is: the tuner in your new TV is picking up the VOD programming your neighbors are watching. That's why you're seeing it fast-forward (rewinding, pausing, and fast-forwarding is done on the cable company's servers, not on the user's cable box), and those spontaneous drop-outs are when someone drops the VOD feed.

The cable company in my neck of the woods blocked this a few months ago, but I used to take some voyeuristic glee in watching what my neighbors were checking out on VOD.

I wouldn't want to know... :o

Isn't it obvious? You're getting the Videodrome signal. Don't watch too long, now... ;)

That explains the giant pair of lips.