Film Prints

On the last Friday of every month a discount theatre in Chandler, AZ plays a “grindhouse” double feature. The opportunity to eyeball actual prints of obscure and classic exploitation films is rare in Arizona, so rare in fact I’m willing to endure the forty minute drive from Phoenix to Chandler to experience these films. Recently I was lucky enough to catch PETS and TORSO, two films I had never seen. Unfortunately, I quickly realized scratchy incomplete prints, while superficially “cool,” don’t make the best maiden viewings.

The digital age, of which I’m an enormous fan, has elevated my bootleg-weaned tastes to value crisp and clear unedited prints that preserve the film’s original intent. This doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate the character of a time worn film stock flickering on a ragged dollar-cine screen. I just feel a solid familiarity with the films would have enhanced my experience. Archive prints should be respected as cinematic ethnography and enjoyed as variations of old favorites. Something akin to hearing the studio outtakes from your favorite band, you must know the original song to properly appreciate the lesser product.

Public Viewings

I showed up half way through PETS. The projection malfunctioned twice after my late arrival leading to long breaks in the film that baited the audience’s already festering contempt for the film. I can handle technical difficulties, but the vocal and vapid audience got on my nerves. Their shallow mocking of the poor framing, stiff acting, outrageous dialogue, boom cameos, etc. was the stuff of frat parties. Their patronizing attitude towards the type of film that I hold dear turned me off immensely. Now don’t get me wrong I understand why these films are prone to mockery, but the comments were unfunny, inappropriate, and disruptive. It was like I was watching the film with an auditorium full of robots rejected by MST3K.

The skill level of the commentary aside, the group dynamic cheapens the experience. The rowdy and disrespectful atmosphere robs genuine fans of any meaningful connection or absorption of the film. I don’t know how long genre dilettantes can continue deriving enjoyment from the fact that the protagonist opts for the knife over the gun during a fight scene. At some point you have to progress past the bromidic genre trope chuckles and derive a deeper appreciation for the art. From the little I witnessed PETS has much more to offer than cheap laughs.

I noticed some nice set design flourishes placing our lead (exploitation starlet Candice Railson) near vertical lines (drapes, wood paneling) reflecting her psychological entrapment by a female companion and foreshadowing her literal caging by a misogynistic playboy. The playboy, by the way, delivers one of the best speeches in the annals of exploitation; a sexist, hate-filled rant that left the crowd roaring and me breathless. It was outrageously written, almost more impressive than funny despite the hysterics of the audience. PETS certainly deserves another visit at home sometime.

Experiences like this and your typical movie theatre clichés (i.e. kids kicking chairs, talking, cell phones, candy wrappers) have driven me indoors I do almost all of my film viewing at home now. Are there any other agoraphobic cinephiles out there?

I must be the luckiest moviegoer on the planet, because I very rarely have these sorts of experiences.

At Exhumed, which is the closest equivalent here to what you're describing, they have a strict policy against this sort of talking back at the screen. They announce at the start that you can laugh or applaud, but no jokes, wisecracks, etc. or they'll toss you out. And the audiences, even the big ones, are well-behaved.

doug

I don't particularly like PETS, but it does have one great sequence...which I think you may have missed. It's where Candice Rialson forces her bound captive to have sex with her in the woods. Pretty sweaty stuff.