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| Enter Michelle Gomez, in a sweeping, calf-length light-brown overcoat. A new acquaintance is entitled to be wary of the proffered hand. Is she suddenly going to crouch in a karate position and scream oriental expletives? Is she about to burst into torch song? Or perform an efficient Heimlich manoeuvre? Strip and cartwheel? For a woman who turned the little nutshell of her office in Channel 4’s Green Wing into a private experimental circus space, the possibilities are legion. This is an actress who could do anything. Whether that includes what she is going to attempt next, we are about to find out. She spools back to a memory of standing in Greig’s kitchen and urging her to accept the challenge. “We were going, ‘Wow, what do you think?’” she says. “For all the reasons I’m doing this, I said to Tamsin at the time, ‘It’s one of those career boxes that you have to tick.’” Not that Gomez had any suspicion she would ever be invited to tick it herself. Gomez is one of those creatures of exotic plumage who seems incapable of opening her mouth or moving a muscle without the intention of getting a laugh. She has the straight face for it, blue reptilian eyes and angular cheekbones. Her extraordinary physical performance, in Green Wing, as Sue White, the NHS’s least appropriate personnel manager, was all elbows and eyebrows, abetted by a superfine ear for breezy irony. As things stand, she’s predicting that her Kate will scarcely raise a titter, but then she thought the same about Gretchen in Boeing Boeing. Gomez has been getting laughs all her life. She grew up in Glasgow. My mother would tell me to stop pissing about, but would sort of encourage it as well. Everybody said, ‘Oh, you’re such a bloody actress.’” Sue White’s repertoire of surreal mannerisms was duly greeted by her family as “the laziest performance I’ve ever given. It’s like me on Christmas Day, doing all my party pieces one after the other”. There was never any doubt that she would end up showing off professionally, but it has taken an age for her quirky talents to be recognised. She applied twice to the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama - “And they were having none of it. Then I went in one year and I said, ‘Will you just let me in on the teachers’ course, then?’” After graduating, she set up a drama-teaching company that toured schools with the aim of stamping out bullying. “What used to amaze me was the turnaround by the end of the day. I’d explain the workshop at the start and say, ‘Does anybody have a question?’ I’ll never forget this one boy who put his hand up and said, ‘Can I f*** you, miss?’ I said, ‘Yes, of course you can.’ I mean, he was 12. ‘If you’ll only just wait for me outside the staff room, we can get on to that later.’ I left him there for a bit, then came out and said, ‘Okay, do you really want to do that?’ I challenged him and, when he came back in, he was fantastic. I imagine I probably will head back into teaching in the not too distant future.” Green Wing, which, for all its teams of writers and three-month rehearsal period, gave Gomez free rein to improvise. “I was in my office with a camera, and I think most of the time [the cameraman] wasn’t there. He’d just leave it set up, and I’d fanny about for hours.” They were all there, though, when her office was mocked up in Birmingham zoo for the scene in which she sang Circle of Life to a lion cub. “Because a lion cub can’t be touched until it’s over a certain age, we got this massive ... child, like a nine-year-old. All these huge men just crapped themselves and jumped up onto chairs. It was when the trainer said, ‘I don’t have any control over it, just to let you know’ - that really reassured us. I lost an eye. I’ve got a wooden leg now. I’ve soldiered on. I’ll be all right.” “That’s why I took the job. When I looked at that speech, I just thought, ‘This is utter bollocks, because I’m never, as a modern actress, talking to a modern audience, going to be able to make them believe I mean any of this.’ That was the real hook for me. I had no idea how to do it. And I still don’t.” |
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| Because a lion cub can’t be touched until it’s over a certain age, we got this massive ... child, like a nine-year-old. All these huge men just crapped themselves and jumped up onto chairs. It was when the trainer said, ‘I don’t have any control over it, just to let you know’ - that really reassured us. I lost an eye. I’ve got a wooden leg now. I’ve soldiered on. I’ll be all right.” |
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| When Greig’s Beatrice went on to win the Olivier award last year, the RSC evidently determined that a hospital comedy with only the faintest toehold in reality is the go-to source for actresses equipped to play Shakespeare’s difficult women. |