Hellooooooo! Wow, I haven't been on here in ages. I promise I will make an effort to continue with other fics but this has been festering on my computer for a while now. :P

Hope you all enjoy. Just a one-shot.

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Several hours after the event the sound of laughter still flew through the bar. Only two of them left, but the ones that had caused the noise all night. The barman has considered chucking them out earlier, but they were both sneaky and attractive even when drunk, they’d find somewhere else to drink – better he took their money.

Neither of them could remember who had ordered the first round of drinks, they had just seemed to magically appear when the conversation, stunted to begin with, had begun to dry up. The drinks had come thick and fast, which led to their current state of drunkenness. So much in fact they had forgotten that they hated each other and he allowed her to be slumped on his shoulder.

Guy searched through the amass of dead soldiers before him, trying to find something they had left before he got out his wallet and paid for the drinks again – she said she had paid for enough that night. He found it difficult, only being allowed use of one arm (his companion’s weight had send his other one numb) but eventually he found a shot that they had overlooked. Quickly downing it before she sat back up, Guy in the same motion called for the bartended to bring more drinks.

Sue, despite the relative comfort of Guy’s arm, pushed herself into a sitting position using the table and Guy. Later Guy questioned whether she had intentionally put her hand on his crotch, but he reasoned she wasn’t really aware of what she was doing; she had after all drank twice as much as him easily given her habit of stealing his drink before he’d even paid for it. The first time she’d done it he’d resisted throttling her and decided he would think it charming rather than annoying.

Wordlessly they both reached for the shots before them and looking each other dead in the eye they counted to three before their race began. As had happened in the previous twelve races Sue won.

“Ok…take something off!”

“What!”

“I won. That means you take something off Donkey-boy.”

“I’ve explained this to you already Sue. We’re in a pub, I’m not taking my clothes off.”

“Fucking pansy! Fine, fine, fine, come with me then!”

She grabbed his hand and her bag and began dragging them both towards the door. The barman looked on relieved and vaguely amused at the man’s expression of utter annoyance; the Scot didn’t look around at all.

They crashed through the door and the barman had to do a quick double-take to ensure they hadn’t broken it, they hadn’t, but they had left it wide open with the rain pummelling the floor and bouncing into his bar. Grumbling he moved to shut it and saw them stumbling by the edge of the road. So glad was he to get rid of them he didn’t even do the decent thing of ordering them a taxi.

The rain had soaked them both through by the time they had taken half a dozen (slightly wobbly) steps into the night, but Guy really didn’t see this as a problem. If he fell ill, then it was a few days of work and if he didn’t…he lost the track of his thought when Sue’s entire shirt managed to stick to her figure in the all the right places. And two of the button seemed to magically vanish when he looked. He didn’t remember taking them off her but he could feel them bouncing in his pocket.

And Sue herself was bouncing up and down next to him, attempting in her thoroughly deranged way to encourage him to move. He did. They did. Eventually they reached his flat, which admittedly wasn’t far, but there had been two incidents. Once involving them nearly getting run over by what may or may not have been Joanna (the car definitely swerved towards them) and the other involving Sue trying to climb onto Guy’s back for a piggy-back ride. Which he granted. For about five feet until he felt her nipples in his back, stood up too quickly and she abruptly fell into a puddle. Without much thought she had stood up and started removing her wet clothes before remembering that they were still outside.

Therefore when they reached Guy’s flat there was a degree of expectation in the air. And a degree of moisture, hence why Sue had divested herself of shirt, skirt, stockings and suspenders without any ceremony before Guy could get out of his shirt. It was moments like this he wondered how he could ever dislike her. To his chagrin Sue didn’t immediately jump onto him but went immediately to his collection of bottles, picking one for each of them and falling onto the sofa after tossing a full bottle of vodka to him.

He joined her eagerly and they continued their drinking games long into the night. At some point he’s sure he kissed her but their bodies seemed to blur too much for them to remember much after that.

The following morning they both woke with hangovers and still, thankfully, in their underwear at least. Both had lost their bounce from the previous night at stumbled clumsily around Guy’s living room before Sue managed to pull on most of her clothes and bolted for the front door.

When Mac asked him the following morning how his evening as Sue’s bought and paid-for slave had gone Guy stopped dead and made a decision.

“What I expected really. Fucking nonsense from her and I paid for the whole night. Then she buggered off before I could cop a feel…not that I’d want to!”

For once Mac believed him. Sue White was commonly consented between the two of them to be the absolute last resort and Mac had no doubt that even Guy couldn’t go that far for sex.

Guy spent the rest of the day spraying himself with Lynx to rid his body of the smell of vodka and perfume.

The End.

Hahahaha! Loved it! Although I am slightly disappointed that they didn't do anything, full credit to you because I just thought they would so it was quite a surprise that we find out it was only a close thing in the end. I really do love the Sue and Guy ship. They would make such an amazingly fun couple it's untrue!

You rule, Sue's*Bitch; have a nibble on this: :cookie

Guy uses Lynx :D

A really good 'one shot' Are you going to hang around and do some more :)

Ekk! Ive missed the Sue/Guy Lurving!!!

Ohh Guy so wanted to cop a feel!! :P Naughty