This is the Ongoing War Against Congratulations Balloons, or the OWACB for short.

At the moment of typing, there are four members of the OWACB.

Please join and wage war agiants congratualtions balloons!

:ph43r:

I shall join!

Me too. Death to all Congratulations balloons and their evilness!

Why are they evil!! they just happened to be there anmd i had a talk with one of them and they said they were forced to be there!! they had been stuck in that damn box for days!

Now hold on a moment, let's not be too hasty, let's not do anything rash...

*runs off into local birthday card shop and starts a frenzied popping of every congratulations balloon she sees*

Although I have to say, I'm not terribly good at confrontation, so maybe I could be involved in the intel side of the operation, you know, get you all the inside info on the movements of the afore said congratulation balloons, help you to plan the military campaign, provide the tea and biscuits, etc etc.?

:roflmao I seem to be geting the giggles atm.

I'm anti-war but I'll join you in spirit and stay on the home front waiting for you to write back from the trenches.

You could help me with the tea and biscuits Little Simba?

Wait I believe I first declared war on the balloons???

ah, but i was intelligent enough to start a thread and a club. :P

ahhh but I am ze one zat actually put ze war into action. I haff ze weapons non?

Ah, but i haff pointy nails und ein banana.

right you are commander non? can I be ze chief (or whatever it is) of weaponary and attck tactics zen?

I don't now why I iz talking like a nazi from a film, I just felt like it

:lol:

It is very enjoyable when you were planning a war.

Here's a topic related conversation:

Friend: y r u agenst congratulations balloons?
PR : ¬_¬
PR : They are evil
Friend: Why?
PR : Because
Friend: ...why?
PR :Because
Friend: ...good argument there lol
PR : Yup.
Friend: ...ok
PR : *nods evilly*
Friend: Right.. [changes subject]


Just thought you'd like to know. :D

hee hee zat sounds like a sehr gut converzation :D

right *cracks knuckles* we must bomb all ze occasions shops...vhat explosive shall ve use? I voz zinking zat we should use ze TNT? Are we agreeing?

*brings in a tray of biscuits and lots of mugs of tea (i wasn't sure how many mugs to make - how many of us are there?)*

i've been out and about all day (well, on my lunch hour at least) gathering inside information for you Commander PR and Weapons-and-Tactics-Chief TinkerBell. My spies have infiltrated their hideout, and we are compiling a report for you as I speak (or type).

we should be ready to report any day now.

may I ask when the attack is scheduled for? i'd like a chance to get my men and women out of there before you strike.




p.s. i'll leave the biscuits... feel free to help yourselves. although the tea might have gone a bit cold by the time anyone reads this.

Bingle, fank you vezy muchly for ze buscuits and tea. Just so people are knowing I iz ze Master of Weaponary and tactics now :D I thought it sounded better.
Ze attack should happen in ze next few days, we need to do some careful planning and make sure ze enemy iz defenceless. I also seem to haff run out of TNT, I haff an atomic bomb but I sink zat is not yet necissary, non?

Nono.

No atomic warfare, it could easily affect special agents macartney and secretan.

Well done on the recon bingle, there'll be a promotion for you if you work thsi hard!

Non, zat iz what I fawt.
Do ve vait for a new batch of TNT to be delievered zen or do we use different anunition? I zink I haff some interesting things here.

What is it yuo have, Weapons-and-Tactics-Chief TinkerBell?

Vell I haff some sehr reactive chemicals zat I can create our own bomb with, or zer is alvays ze gunpower?

are you talking in a german accent!!!

Would I get a badge?!

*takes empty mugs and plate of biscuits away*

I'll tell my spies to get themselves out in the next 24hrs, prior to the strike. I've given the intelligence operation the codename 'Operation Pelicans'. The tactical withdrawal of my surveillance teams will be codenamed 'operation pelicans to the kitchen' (hmmm... does this sound familiar...?).

*brings in another tray of biscuits (chocolate digestives) and mugs of tea*

Commander PR and MOWAT Tinkerbell, I await your further instructions.

Over and out.

Bingle

p.s. if you have any request for particular biscuits, i have intelligence operatives stationed at most major supermarkets - i can get just about anything! :)

:roflmao :roflmao

Ooh, yes, I'll help with the tea and biscuits, bingle.

I'll also be willing to lend a hand with Operation Pelicans to the Kitchen and I'll do my best to ensure the weasel is still in the cage. :lol:

Okay Little Simba. It's good to have you onboard.
We're currently awaiting further instructions from Commander PR and MOWAT Tinkerbell. And keeping the biscuits topped up.

The weasel is still in its cage. :)
Oh, and I have a spare flamethrower if it's going to be needed. Or are we just using the bombs?

ha ha!
can i join?
i may not have a bomb but i have something very useful...
*pulls out a safty pin*

Indeed I am, I haff made a new ruling...when ve are talking ov ze OWACB ve haff to talk like a Nazi from a film.
Bingle good job viz ze tea and biscuits......I'm rather liking ze pink wafers, ze ones viz ze pink panther on ze packet. :D
Operation Pelicans sounds good, ze enemy iz still unaware ov our attack.
Report back if zer iz any changes.

Umm iz I alone in ze attempt to rid ze world ov ze evil balloons?

HOW CONGRATULATIONS BALLOONS RUIUNED MY LIFE:
see conversation below.

THE SCENE: it is my birthday, several months ago jst after the final episode. My wounds are still raw. many people are arriving at my house. large amounts of sugar have already been consumed, and my friend who i secretly fancied arrives at the door.

FRIEND: happy birthday!!! they didnt have any birthday balloons so here is a congratulations one instead.
ME: ....
FRIEND: ??
ME: (tearfully) thank you...
FRIEND: it did cost like five pounds so u could PRETEND to be grateful
OTHER PERSON: are you OK?
ME: (throw it back at him and run away)
FRIEND: WELL IM SORRY THEY DIDNT HAVE ANY BIRTHDAY ONES. IT IS NOT MY FAULT. YOU ARE NEVER GRATEFUL WHEN I MAKE AN EFFORT.
OTHER FRIEND: yeah, what's wrong with you? ur so shallow, just because he didnt get you a proper present



since then, we have mysteriously grown apart.


please can i be the Cannon operator??

Sure you can :hug

I hate CB *looks embarrased* I actually kinda get scared of them, if they're near me. I don't know why but I hate helium balloons being near me.
Okay I'm going to run away to outer mongolia now.

can i join?!!!!! i hate congratulations balloons now :angry:

they're evil *narrows eyes* Evil!!!

And of course!!

very good vere will i start destroying the evil ballons?

VEN we got somethin to put in the cannons.......


what about holly?

Ah now Holly ze babykiller iz anuzzer schtory.
I voz finkin zat ve could get millions of pirhanas and lauch zem at ze balloons..................................

My spies tell me that piranhas are notoriously difficult to work with. I'd strongly suggest another breed of fish - maybe swordfish? Far more effective in a combat situation such as this... and there is the potential that one swordfish can take out a number of balloons simultaneously...

Oh and Tinkerbell... I've tried the German accent, but I just can't do it. I'm thinking that there is something terribly British about spies, so I thought I'd stick with an upper class British accent, if that's ok?

vot ein inschpired idee...

Zat is okay Bingle, I sink ve shall need von english speaking persons for zis operation.
Vell maybe ze piranhas is not such a gut idee, maybe ve can use hornets?

Hornets... I think that might work... but you need to send something in there with them tho, in order to get them really riled up and angry... otherwise they might just ignore the balloons...

Also... the use of hornets greatly increases the collateral damage. And if the wind changes, they might turn round on us...

And... hornets scare me... :blush

*leaves tray of pink wafer biscuits and several mugs of coffee*

vot about those stupid cranefly things that hav infested our field?