M K, i didn't see a topic about this so.....

But, is keeping your viginity until after marriage an important issue to you?

For me i think that it would be the best thing to do. I mean, sex is a big step in a relationship. Your opening yourself up to someone physically and emotionally. Sex should be saved for the person your sure you want to spend the rest of your life with.

In some religions, sex before marriage is a sin, but i don't think it is necessarily. I think that if you truely love someone, its alright. If you know for sure that you deeply, truely love that person, you shouldn't have to wait. :no:

Right now, i could care less about keeping my virginity. But, thats just my teenage mind speekin right there.... :sweat:

What do you think?

It wasn't that important to me until my friend started having sex with her *arrogant, immature* boyfriend. When she told me I was really shocked, but I didn't think that much on it. But after they had sex a couple times she began to have pregnancy scares, and getting really nervous about getting a disease *nervous to the point of getting sick* and I just thought "It isn't worth it." So I agree with you Goddess, if the person is someone you truley love and a person you know your going to spend the rest of your life with, then you shouldn't have to wait. I just take things into consideration like disease, pregnancy, and other issues. I want to wait until I'm married, but who knows? Maybe my mind will change along the way. But I can tell you one thing, my friend has lost quite a few friends because she did this. A lot of my friends are virgins and don't support sex before marriage, so she doesn't have many left. And I do feel bad for her, but it just wasn't such a good decision on her part. And plus, the guy shes with, is nothing but an arrogant jerk who should never even be existing on this planet. You may think thats harsh, but its true. He's the one who forced her into having sex. So, he's an ******* in my book. Sorry, I just don't like him *obviously!* But yeah, I want to wait until marriage.

It's a personal choice. As a (former) Catholic, we were taught that sex before marriage is a sin, but now I can reason that it is really the person's choice whether or not they are ready. If they've found that special person that they want to share an intimate bond with then they should be able to do whatever they want to do and not be intimidated by the threat of being a "sinner."

Hmm...This is a hard one, in a way. Well, yes, while being a persons own choice, they should consider the risks of it first if they aren't married to the person. Why throw away your virginity to someone you don't know if you'll be with forevor? Sure, it may seem like you'll be togethor forevor, but remember, shit happens.

As for the 'sex is sin' thing...I think sex is only a sin if you end up HURTING(mentally) someone else. Like if you commit adultry, then its a sin because its hurting your spouse..Or your bf/gf...Whatever, I think you get it.

Anyways, enough of my weird ramblings. As you can probably tell by now I think its important to wait untill you're married.

Okay, my thoughts on virginity. I think it's a very, very bad idea to have sex with someone if you don't love them. Maybe I'm naive, but that's just my view. Making love is an extremely intimate act, and it shouldn't be wasted on one night stands and a first date with a guy you hardly know.

Sex before marriage? Yeah, okay. Just protect yourselves, and know all the risks before getting involved. Understand that you're putting your feelings on the line and throwing the possibility of pregnancy out there. Be educated. Know about birth control. IMO, both partners should get checked for STDs beforehand (even if you've never had sex yet) just so there are no nasty surprises. Planned Parenthood gives out free contraceptives if you agree to get an exam. If you love your partner, go ahead. Just be smart about it. :)

Because I believe that there's not really much wrong with sex before marriage doesn't mean I don't value virginity. It's important to trust your partner throughly, and have no doubts that you are in love. If this is the case, making love can be a wonderful act of intimacy that borders being beautiful as it's two people showing each other the utmost physical form of love for one another (do I sound like a high school health video?). A lot of the time, it's best to wait until marriage just to cut down on the worry scale. But love doesn't follow reason, does it? If you're in love, just follow your heart.

And as for sex being a sin, I don't think so. I don't really see it as anything dirty, but something sort of sweet and poetic in a loving way (holy cheesiness). So if two people love one another, I don't understand why them sharing that through the intimate act of sex is a sin. Regardless of whether it's two men or two women. Sex isn't a sin in my book.

Sex is NOT a sin. In fact, God even tells us to "be fruitful and multiply". However, the real sin is to have sex before marriage.

Sex was created as a Wedding Gift between a man and wife. They are to be virgins until they marry. God told us in the Bible not to have Sex before marriage for a good reason: Unwanted pregnancies, and disease. I know of some diseases can be transmitted just through contact of the genital area.

It is also very spiritual. Making Love is a very beautiful thing, and not to be thrown away on someone who you might not spend the rest of your life with. You might make yourself believe that it's very possible you might spend the rest of your life with them, but how can you be sure? Even with your fiancee. Something might happen. That's why you have sex after marriage. Sex strengthens the bonds between a man and wife, and spitiually, and emotionally, you're kind of giving your heart to them.

The act of sex makes babies, as we know. ;) Children need parents, parents that will look after them, who will stay together, and they both take on the job of doing it properly, raising their young ones the right way.

Anyways, what it comes down to, that keeping your Virginity until you meet your marriage partner is what's right in God's eyes. :)

I don't really know if you want a guy's imput but whatever here goes.

I think it is important, yes. I have nothing against sex before marriage but would never force a partner to do so if they did see it as a sin. I believe as long as you love that person more than anything that it's okay. My sister done this, had a kid and is now happily married :)

I think it's really silly to throw something like this away just for gits and shiggles (;)). As people have said, it's meant to be a beautiful thing shared between two lovers, not just for fun.

And the reason for me accepting sex before marriage, it's because if two people love each other enough then, do it. They could get married and divorce later so I don't think that them splitting up before marriage is much difference :ermm: Always willing to be converted though :gift:

I feel that one should keep them self until marriage. Like Goddess said, its a major step in a relationship and shouldn't be just thrown around. Some people just do it as if it were a meaningless act but I think there's a lot weighing with it. It means that you are truly close enough. This is why I value emotional intimacy so much. I want to be emotionally close before I become physically because physically intimacy can be abused.

There ya go. Call me a biased religious freak, but its true. Ah'm a true blue Mormon gal. Deal. ^_______^

I probably don't think sex before marriage is a sin because I don't believe in the teachings of Christ or the Bible (not to say I'm an atheist because I believe in God).

I certainly don't think sex should just be thrown around. But having sex before marriage with someone you love and have been with for years isn't really throwing it around, is it? And why can't you have a spirtual connection through making love if you're not yet married? In today's society, being married doesn't mean "spending the rest of your lives together" half of the time. I think what's most important is the depth of your relationship, not necessarily the title of married or not because that means little to many people today.

I always told myself, that i would keep my virginty till i get married, or the day i finally feel that i can spend the rest of my life with someone. That day happened quite a long time ago. And well me and her are together now, we had a couple tough times, but now we are back together and everything is great, and i still followed what I said.

I fell in love with this girl, and want to spend the rest of my life with her, which is what im hoping happens. I've never had this much feeling for anyone...she is simply amazing...

but otherise...i think virginty is important, and that it should be held till you think you really are in love, because losing it should happen to someone you really care for ya know?

It all depends on the person. If you're religious, then your view of sex before marriage is most likely to be very different from someone who doesn't follow the Bible's teachings. Since I'm not religious, keeping my virginity was never really a big issue for me. I wasn't in any rush to lose it, but didn't think keeping it was all that important either. I don't regret losing it when I did, because I did feel that I was ready to take that step.

I think that's the all-important thing. Being ready. It's not about being sure that you're going to be with this person forever, because who can be sure of that? As long as you're sure that you're ready, and you're both consenting adults, it's your call.

Sex before marriage isn't dirty or immoral. Depending on your emotional state, sex can mean different things to you each time, whether you're married to your partner or not. I'll probably come across as cynical for saying this, but sex isn't going to be special and beautiful every time. Sometimes you do it because you're so into someone that you just have to do it otherwise it feels like you'll explode, sometimes you do it to express your love for your partner, sometimes you just feel obligated, and sometimes you do it because you're exploring sexually. That's why people say that having sex and making love are two different things. It's the same act, but you're not in the same frame of mind.

I think it's ok to have sex before marriage. If you love someone there is no stopping it. And having sex makes it even deeper. I've only loved two people...and got cheated on by both of them with my best friend at the time (same friend both times too...although he's no longer my friend).

i say do it with someone u love. whether it is before or after marriage doesn't really matter. as long as you love the person you're with and they feel the same, go have fun.

Virginity isn't an important issue to me. Sex is how two people can let loose their emotions and enjoy themselves, or express their love in a physical way. I would also say sex is a vibrant part of youth, it plays an important part in relationships when people are young and can easily make or break a relationship. Sex can also boost one's confidence, can change a person for the better with their personality and bringing them out more into society.

But as Madame said, it can also be to let out a lot of emotions. Sex is seen in a lot of different ways, people can just really be horny and want to let it all out, or perhaps they are depressed or have been hurt by something and want it to take all of their sadness off their minds. There's tons of other reasons, but I can't be bothered to type em all xD

I don't believe in sex before marraige. However, if you really do love someone and they really love you...that person should understand if you want to wait. Your virginity is something sacred that you own. And I could type other wise babble, but I don't feel like it.

Sex is a powerful, beautiful thing.

Like anything, there's a right way to have sex, and a wrong way to have sex. However, the right and wrong ways are subject to the whims of the individuals involved.

Virginity is the greatest gift you can give to your husband. Why? When you're virgin, you're untouched and pure, only the person you love most can. When you lose it, lose it to someone who doesn't deserve it, it can't be brought back. In South Korea, Japan, China and Philippines, sex is a sacred thing, we don't do it casually. XD okay, i'll stop.

Ehh, I'm more practical about it. I'm saving myself for when either I or my dear one can get fixed. XD

Oh sure, everyone's pestered me about condoms and such, but my brother and I are living proof that contraceptives are never 100% foolproof. :whistle: Besides...no rush.

And w00t, we're celebrating our 2nd year today. >D

Yes..I'd say it is important to me. I like keeping the only form of purity I have..heehee.
I also would like my first time to be with someone excrutiatingly special and one whom I love very much, not just some shmo in a one night stand.
^^

-Lady :aeris:

Virginity is an important issue to it symbolizes who you are. And it really sounds like an important title.

Here's the definition of Viriginity (Taken from Virgin)
Virgin: A maiden, a woman who has no sexaul intercourse. ADJ: pure, maidenly, chaste, unused

Now technically, you dont have to be a woman to be a virgin :rolleyes:. You could be a boy and still have never had sexual intercourse.

My mother told me that if you have NEVER been touched by anyone during sexual intercourse, then thats being a virgin. Its not just about the "cherry being popped" (if you know what that means :blush:). That goes along with it but thats, not to her, considered you're "virginity".

I see why people would save it for the right person. But when it comes to thinking about sex, temptation can get the best of people. Some may want to have it right then and there, while others would have the patience to wait. Those who dont must not honestly care that having sex BEFORE marriage is a sin, because they only care about how they feel. And its fine to me...but its not like Ive done it though.

When you're sexually active (having sex with someone), your emotions are put on the line. And if something doesn't work out, or if you find out your were just ebing used, you are going to be torn up. I say at least wait until you're married so you wont have to regrets. Because you're virginity is something you can never get back.



...I'll felt like I said a little too much :ermm:

(By the way, has anyone seen the movie "Virgin Suicide" starring Kirsten Dunst. If you have I was wondering if you could tell me how does this realte to the topic?)

...so what if a virgin couple marries, consummates, and then divorces sometime later?

Sorry, it is my opinion that virginity based on morals alone is overrated. It's not a sin if a couple that truly loves one another consummates before marriage. However, on the flip side, if it's true love, they ought to be able to wait until both sides are fairly well established in life--this is speaking from a practical sense. Still, nobody's perfect... :whistle:

Also, sex is not always emotional. I know that sounds confusing, but sometimes it just isn't. Casual sex happens. It's not something I've fully been able to wrap my brain around just yet, but I know it happens, and that's ok, as long as everybody is responsible.

I have a question for those who consider virginity a sign of a girl's purity: Why is it that if a guy 'scores', he's labelled a player (not necessarily in a negative way), while a girl is automatically labelled a 'slut' if she does the same? The double standards are confusing to me.

Perhaps this is a question for another topic? I dunno--Madame?
:o

Well, they way I look at it, it depends on the number of people, who finds out snd they way people look at the situation. If someone knows you've been having sex with lots of people, some will end up calling them a player or a slut. Though a slut is really considered a woman who acts like or is a prostitute.

I could be wrong, but its my opinion. Maybe I should ask my mother...

And perhaps this question should be another topic.

Ahhh...virginity...

Let me share an experience with you all.

A week after my 20th birthday, I was pressured into having intercourse with the guy I was living with (his pregnant sister, who was raped and got pregnant lived with us). I didnt want to, but I was scared that if I didn't he'd kick me out, and I had nowhere to go, living in Tennessee and so far from my family in Michigan. So I did it...it really was for me, the scariest thing in my life, since I didn't really want to in the first place...although it must have been majorly embarrassing for him, because of other unmentionable things...*cough*hewashorrible*cough*.

Staying away from it, I met someone, and eventually I had intercourse again after getting high (yah...gross stuff, dont do it, I'm clean now!). I'm not at all comfortable with intercourse...doesn't matter if the person is intended for me or not.

I guess I wanted to share this with you to show some examples of real sexual sin. I believe being pressured into it was a sin committed by the other person, and then myself doing drugs just so I COULD stomach having intercourse was a sin I committed.

Since then it has been 4 years...nearly 5 since I've had intercourse (or anything to do with guys at all besides just casual talking). That's what regret will do to you...and yes, I wish I would have waited for the right person.

Sex after marriage? Nice thought, but doesn't always happen. I dont think it's a sin really, if you're in love.

I think that depends on what you want. If virginity is not an important issue to you, then you won't regret having sex, but if you DO want that the one you have sex with, is someone/the one you love, then having sex just because you felt like doing it, or because people pressured you into doing it, then you'll most likely feel bad about it, and regret it your whole life.

As people say, the first one is the one you'll always remember.

Carmen: I have a two things to say in regards to your post. First of all, I really don't like the idea of a virgin being pure and "unused." I know those weren't your words, but I've been seeing the connection between a virgin and purity come up in this topic a couple of times. This suggests that sex is dirty... that once you have it, your somehow stained and tainted. I think that's a really bad image to promote. Sex can be a beautiful thing (although it can also be to just relieve horniness ;)). When two people truly, passionately love one another, I don't see what's so dirty about them making love to one another. I think it's very romantic. Basically, I think people should stop implying sex as something dirty and shameful.

Second of all, I haven't seen The Virgin Suicides, but I read the book by Jeffery Eugenides. It actually has nothing to do with virginity. One of the characters who commits suicide (I think her name was Lux) was actually very much not a virgin. The book actually discussed her sexual escapades on her rooftop with several different faceless partners. The use of the term "Virgin" in the title is, I think, a metaphor for the girls whose deaths were brought on by an omnipotent force that asphyxiated their will to live.

Yeah, I'd say it falls under the topic of sexism more than anything else. I'll start a seperate topic about it in order to keep things on the subject of the thread.

Yay, midnight and I have big plans tomorrow, but still feel a need to post! :lol:

First off, I don't care for all of this use of the word pure for virgins, implying that those who are not are not "pure". I find that there are many virgins who act in ways far less "pure" than those who have had sex. I think I will just be honest as I respond. I lost my virginity a long time ago, age 14, and now am married to that same man. I feel that it is wise to wait until you feel ready for sex, wheather that be after marriage, or simply when you can deal with what can become of it. You have to know to use protection if you aren't ready for a child, and be prepared if you could end up in heartbreak over it.

Virginity is simply a choice you have, it doesn't define who you are. To anyone who would say I am less pure than them for my choice, I feel very dissappointed. To me, I feel that the fact I have chosen to remain with one man and be married shows a great sense of purity and strength, when there are virgins who chose to take drugs and drink while never taking any relationship seriously and cheating with kisses and words. My point is, there is a lot for to defining yourself than one choice. To call all virgins pure and all that chose differently not-pure is wrong to me. I completely respect the decision to wait, but I will simply say that there is more to being pure than waiting until you are married to have sex.

I hope that this doesn't come across as me simply being defensive, I am trying to make a point, I swear! :lol: Oh and goddess, could you specify your views for me? I was confused when you said that it was the best thing to do, then saying you could care less about keeping your virginity.

*tries to figure out a slick line to end rant/lecture/whatever with* In my opinion, the greatest gift you can give anyone, including your husband, is to simply be the best person you can be, which means you should always treat yourself and everyone else with respect. Respect your body and mind, and take care of both in the way that you know best, and don't be afraid to get others to help you to do that. :gift: *suspects that was more cheesy than slick*

Ah, thanks for saying that, Tacofoolio. I've been trying to voice a similar idea, but couldn't put it as well as you did.

As I said before, I also really don't like the idea of calling virgins pure. I don't think that sex should be viewed as a stain, and I think it can breed sexism to say that sex depurifies a woman (althought that discussion is for a different topic).

As Taco said, virginity is just a choice people make. Who will you first have it with and when. Not really that much more, IMO. It shouldn't be viewed as something holy and pure because then that's defining yourself by whether or not you've had sex, and implying that virgins are impure places a social stigma on sex, and I don't think that's the right attitude.

I completely agree, just being a virgin doesn't make you a pure, innocent soul. Some people can be arrogant, backstabbing and emotionless people who are evil and will do whatever they can to get what they want. It really all depends on the person.

But I don't think anyone in the world can be "pure" at all because we all have our dark sides.

Like an old friend said to me:

"How would you feel if you weren't the only one?"

Virginity is the best gift you can give to your spouse. These are my principles, stick to yours. I read enough books to know what I'm talking about.

yeah i know what you mean there it makes me feel like crap not being virgin anymore. I feel tainted really

i feel the same about this also which is odd cause i'm a guy and most guys are not uncomfortable with sex. i just find it plain old nasty now days, and you know that something is pointless when you can get tired of doing it like its just well it was great back in the day but now i'm bored with ya.

I far and beyond prefer the friendship of a woman than to be with her, cause sex seems to tear relationships apart, it's like all the sudden you know to much about each other and things get just weird.

so i prefer to keep my clothes on and just enjoy the fact that i have woman as friends there some great folks to know, and the majority of the woman i know prefer a good friend over a crappy love partner any day.

so pretty much yeah i wish i would of had the views i have now back way when i did it i was too young very stupid, I could have made bigger problems in my life from it too such as her getting pregnant. that would have sucked


so all i can really say is just do what you want to do with your virginity it's yours.

While I think sex is a very important topic for all that it entails (possible pregnancy or STDs, emotional responses, etc.), I think that "virginity" in itself is overrated in that its simply a lack of having sex. Little else to it--it does not grant you mystical powers or anything of the sort. I do not think losing one's virginity before marriage makes someone a "whore" or makes them less of a person than someone who retains their virginity til marriage. I do not think that retaining one's virginity makes someone a better person or "more pure". It's a matter of choice.

I do think that having sex should be a conscientious decision, in that it shouldn't be done at random (because of the STDs, possible pregnancy, etc.), but I simply don't think that sex is something that is morally "wrong".

From my past experiences with sex (only one guy mind you ^_^), I think it's better to wait until after marriage. When you're still dating someone, they could only want to get in your pants and that would end up hurting yourself as a person.

Why you ask? It's simple.

The only guy that I've slept with (mind you, my parents/guardian doesn't know ^_^) ended up up breaking up with me like a month later and he used my friend to do it. After that, I decided to wait until after marriage because getting a divorce is a long process (evil, I know). In all seriousness, I prefer to wait until after marriage, but who knows. I may change my mind.

The guy I'm with now (Wintercream you know who I'm talking about. I'll explain later if you wish) knows this and he respects my thoughts on the issue. I still wouldn't mind having a fling with him if you know what I mean.

Anyways, I'm not saying that you should just go and turn celebate without thinking about it. Think about what you want to do before hand. I think of sex as a beautiful act that joins two souls and makes one. You just have to be careful of who you do the act with in my view. You don't want to go on the street and find a random stranger and be like "Yeah, lets go have sex." That's just morally wrong.

I also don't think you should make you wife (if you're male) prostitute just to get money. Here is an example. Last night I was watch Jerry Springer and there was this guy that only thought that women were good for three things. Cooking, cleaning, and having sex. Now that's just wrong. He made his wife go prostiuting just to get money for his selfish ambitions. That's someone that you don't want. If you meet a guy like this, run away quick.

But for me, after marriage is the best. But who knows. I might change my thoughts after thinking really hard about it.

MT said it all for me.

There is no difference between being a virgin and not being a virgin other than the fact that you had sex. Nothing else. It is INDEED overrated to the point of hilarity. Pregnancy, STDs, etc. is a different matter altogether though. If you're going to have sex with someone who you're not close enough to to not know if they could have an STD, you should already know not to have sex. After all, an STD can screw up your life, and possibly the life of your baby if you get pregnant. Also think of it this way: Before having sex with someone, ask yourself if you'd really picture them as the father or mother of your baby and be forever connected with them. You may really like the person now, but think about the rest of your life. A lot of teens aren't bright enough to follow this train of thought.

And no, protection doesn't always work. So a couple minutes of sex can change your life if you're not absolutely careful.

I don't care about the whole "sex after marriage" thing. As much as some people would like to deny, sex IS an important part of a relationship and it is an incredible form of bonding when done right (and for the right purpose). I've been with my fiance for about 6 years now and I live with him so I know exactly what I'm in for. Marriage should be much more carefully thought out than how people are doing it today. With a 50% or lower divorce rate, keeping your virginity until after marriage has lost almost all meaning now. The point is that you need to take your time getting to know the person before AND during a relationship. Not what they seem like and not if they share a couple of your interests like how most teens judge their "soul mates" on. :rolleyes: You don't really know a person until AFTER all the hard times.

I could go on forever about this, but anyway. Virginity until marriage is laughable in my opinion.

Aren't you like...13? :mellow:

Reading about things is nowhere near living them.

Sex isn't made of fairy dust and magic, you gaiz.

Of course, you should moderate on how you distribute it, but virginity shouldn't play a roll when you think you love someone. Of course, if things get technical and STDs come into play, sure.

I'm still a virgin and looking. a/s/l pls.

MT? Go first. :aeris:

The old wait until marriage thing has a historical basis. You must realize that back when that tradition began people got married at like 13. So yeah, if you were sleeping around before that, it probably wasn't a good thing. Also marriages were arranged for the most part, so it was in the best interests of the parents to ensure that their children remained virgins until the marriage was completed. This literally meant more dowry, more value for the bride... it was like a sort of business transaction. And in a way, this was good for the times. People back then rarely lived past 30, so they had to get going on the baby-making pretty quickly, and the parents usually had a better idea than the hormone-filled teenagers about compatibility and such.

Obviously we live in different times. To some there is a religious requirement of marriage before sex, but even this I view as somewhat misinterpreted. I do not think God really cares if your nation's government writes you into the tax books as married. The most important part is whether or not you truly love the person. As far as I'm concerned, if you screw around without being in love with the person, you're asking for trouble.

LOVE before sex. Not necessarily marriage before sex, is thus my belief. This serves as a defense against STDs, and supposing there is a contraceptive malfunction or whatever, at least the couple cares for each other and can handle the situation responsibly.

I also think that young teens need to be really careful. Hormones are a real joy to deal with, I know, but still... it's best to wait until you know the time is right. Believe me, you will know when the right time comes... don't force it.

Anyway, that's my $.02. Shoot me down in flames if I'm off my rocker.

I agree with this completely. Provided you can discern love from lust, of course. I don't think you can possibly fall in love with a one-night-stand the moment you see him/her. ^_~

Why does it matter? Would you really think less of a girl if you weren't the only one? I think that says more about your attitude towards sex than anything else. With the guys I've been with, I've always took it as a given that they've had sex with other girls, and it doesn't bother me. In fact, I'd rather they had a little experience, 'cause it means they're more likely to know what they're doing. It's not always the case, though, but you can always teach them what feels good and what does nothing for you. :whistle:

YES. Like I said before, it's all due to your state of mind at the time. Sure, sometimes it's romantic, and that's really nice, but sometimes it's all about getting off and that's really nice too. Sorry if this comes across as offensive to anyone, but it's really naive to think of sex as always all sparkles and romance and two people becoming one.

About waiting for marriage? 'Honey, before you buy the car, you take it for a test drive.' :lol: Seriously though, you don't need to be married to be ready for sex with someone. The most important thing is being ready, not whether you're married or not.

This is why Yukari is my canon astral lover. :huggle: :fangirl:

Too many people read too much fanfiction and/or watch too many LOLROMANCEMOVIEZ, I swear. Sex isn't always like that. In fact, about 1% of it is that "magical". It's sex. The first few times are supposed to be hilarious and awkward because it's a learning experience. :rolleyes:

Sex is a natural part of a relationship. I completely agree with Yukari's "test drive" idea. :lol: The only thing is that the two people MUST be committed and in LOVE, not just physical attraction. Sex is merely an expression of love (if you ignore the basic breeding process). Of course it won't be done right if the people don't love each other unless there's money involved. :lmao:

But yeah, don't think of sex as some kind of magical moment where TWO SOULS BECOME FOREVER INTERTWINED, etc. It's really not. I'm not trying to bring anyone down by saying this, it's just realism. If you base your idea of sex on how you see it in chick flicks, then you'll be horribly disappointed.