The Daily TexanServing The University of Texas at Austin since 1900http://media.www.dailytexanonline.com/medi...e-3327889.shtml4/16/08
Plan B: Al Gore According to current Rasmussen Reports, polls show that John McCain would have a slight edge over Democratic candidates in a general election. It seems as if the negative exposure Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton have received because of their constant, incestuous bickering has caused the Democrats to be left with two exposed, very beatable candidates. Now, the hype of the "dream ticket" the liberals once proudly boasted of seems to have dissipated.
It seemed perfect for Democrats in 2008. They had captured both the House and Senate in 2006 by primarily running against the policies of a vastly unpopular president, and with the disapproval of the Iraq War and the general disdain with the economy's poor performance in recent years, Democrats looked poised to effortlessly pilfer the White House back from the brutish hands of conservatives.
However, we must remember who we are talking about here. If you are not familiar with Murphy's Law - "whatever can possibly go wrong will indeed go wrong, at the worst possible time, in the worst possible way" - it undoubtedly applies here. For the Democrats, to whom Murphy's maxim pertains more often than not, this disastrous outcome would be the election of another Republican to the White House and make 24 of the last 32 years helmed by a conservative.
At the root of the Democrats' problem is Hillary "Huckabee" Clinton's unwillingness to disband her campaign. Her continuation on the trail has led to party infighting and has also caused many Democrats to pit themselves against one another. Some Democrats have even pledged not to vote with their party in the general election if their preferred candidate is not nominated. This lack of unity has caused the Democrats to become very disorganized. It has also allowed McCain and the Republicans time to organize, strategize and relax.
While at one juncture many conservatives - I for one - were worried about the strength of the Republican nominee, we can find solace in simply flipping on the news and hearing about the squabbles between the Democrats. Nothing is more entertaining than watching two people argue to see who is more wrong. As far as I'm concerned, John McCain's wrinkles and weird neck have never looked better.
As the Democratic National Convention creeps closer, the self-destructing Democrats are running out of options. Right now, it seems as if the numbers support Obama's eventual nomination. However, while many college students will be overjoyed by that prospect, many Americans are still skeptical of the once unconventional, ostensibly invincible nominee. Compared to McCain, he looks like an inexperienced, uninformed, albeit more attractive and younger candidate. His recent comments about "bitter" small town citizens and his relationship with a divisive pastor have ostracized some working-class white citizens and hurt him in the polls, as reflected by McCain's climb in many general polls.
However, the Democrats have not tapped all their resources. They still have a couple of tricks up their sleeves - it's just a matter of whether or not they actually want to win.
In an unprecedented move, I would advise the party's elders to look elsewhere for their candidate. With both current contenders' transformation into damaged goods, a fresh face might reenergize the party and offer the hope and change that Democrats all believed in just a few months ago. Their new candidate must be a qualified, knowledgeable man who has had experience in politics before. Also, he must be well-liked and possess a good reputation among the party's elite.
I can only think of one person who fits this bill. It is a man who could potentially salvage the Democratic Party from eventual extinction - and it just so happens that he has honed his superhero skills in recent years by attempting to save the human race from annihilation as well. Yes, the right person for the Democrats to elect as their nominee should be the savior of the planet, Nobel Peace Prize-winner and former almost-president of the United States, Al Gore.
Sure, he would have to lose some weight to regain match-shape before the general election, but that is simple - he could just start shooting hoops with running mate Barack Obama, wind-surf with John Kerry or simply contact some of Hillary's doctors (they sure did a good job making her look good).
Some Democrats, former presidential candidate Chris Dodd included, have actually bought into the idea. For instance, Tim Mahoney, a Democrat congressman from Florida, said last week, "If it goes into the convention, don't be surprised if someone different is at the top of the ticket." In addition, two former Gore campaign officials have told The Sunday Telegraph that a scenario first mapped out by members of Gore's inner circle last May now has a fair chance of coming to fruition.
While a Gore-sweep seems rather unlikely, I tend to agree with journalist Joe Klein, who initially dreamed up this brilliant idea in Time Magazine. It could actually be the perfect outcome from the bloody civil war being raged right now. And the scenario is not that implausible; If neither Obama nor Clinton has the 2,025 delegates needed to win the nomination, the option would be on the table for the 100 super-delegates to offer Gore the nomination, citing the two other candidates' inability to beat McCain.
The Democrats may have strayed from the easy road leading to Pennsylvania Avenue, but all is not lost. Al Gore is a capable man, and he has won an Oscar. Anything's possible.
Earnest is an economics freshman.